Day 49

I've had peeling fingers for a few days now. I'm a little over it.

All the weight I lost in homestay, I'm putting back on at Kulika.

Potatoes and chicken, yes I am eating chicken (it's fried and delicious), rice with stones in it that I'm pretty sure I'm cracking my teeth on, and beans. Shoving my face.

Last night was potatoes, kinda guac, hot spicy stuff, whoo, rice, and gnut sauce (this is like a peanut purple looking sauce) and I went for seconds on the potatoes. Yum. Come back thighs. Come back.

Oh except I have also started working out because I have two ungoals in Africa. One is to die. And the other is to get fat.

So I'm working out. Not the best with dehydration, but happens. I have now twice gone to bed without bathing after a serious workout session. I'm gross. And tired. So gross and tired.

My body also hurts. Can't wait to do insanity!!! Boom. I'm going to hate my life though.

Happens.

So... I didn't talk about this because even though I put this up and share my life, I don't share any of the stuff that I really want to share, that I really would share. I put out safe information.

This information isn't safe. I didn't want people to know because it is so close to me.

My grandpa is sick. Very sick. I found out on Saturday. My mom is currently in Minnesota. She drove there. That's a days drive. I'm scared. She was supposed to leave Thursday. She left Tuesday. There is an urgency.

Everyone is in Minnesota. I'm in Africa and I just want to be there and see my grandpa and touch him and know that he's there.

I feel too removed being here and I'm scared for my family. I'm scared for my mom, for my grandma, for my grandpa. I just don't like being here while people are changing plans.

Something serious is happening and I am literally worlds away.

I also don't think I'm getting the whole story. I'm feeling unstable.

And this is when you realize that sometimes all you have is prayer...